27 April, 2009


There are some people around whom you may always feel insecure, inadequate. No matter what you intend to feel or what you truly DO feel... there are simply some people in this life that seem to water that tiny seed of self doubt down in the depths of your soul, no matter how hard you try to break it open and bury it and allow it to be absorbed by the healthy soil around it. I suppose regardless of how hard you try or how much you may want to, it's just not feasible to feel confident and free ALL of the time. And perhaps without the now-and-then sensations of self-doubt, you would never know the constant joys of having someone remind you of self-worth, someone who can lift your heart up and keep it safe from the dangers of creeping insecurities. I am grateful in this life for both the relationships that are character-forming, that are complicated and trying; and for the relationships that - though green as new buds - have roots that go a hundred yards deep and still somehow make you feel as though you're flying.

Not lost on me is the blog soundtrack of John Mayer's The Heart of Life which happens to be playing while I write this tonight (thumbs up, Pandora!).

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