Sometimes my husband is wise beyond his years. The other night we were having a good conversation about making sure we continue to communicate with each other as best as we are able; we're usually very good at this - communicating - but on this particular night, a deep rooted habit of mine was getting in the way: the fear of being a "nag".
I am my mother's daughter. 99% of the time, I put others' needs, others' joys, others' wants ahead of my own - I'm a people pleaser. And quite often, doing something to make another person happy in turn makes me happy. But there is a time when this habit can get in my own way: when I need help. Mostly, I'm not very good at asking for help. I multi-task. I cook almost every night (even when my beau offers to make something). I don't even use the intern at work for much - I make my own copies, reconcile my own bills, do my own filing. Somewhere along the line, I began to think that asking for help - asking someone else to do something I could probably handle on my own - was naggish, was whiny, was just not me. I'm the people pleaser! I'm the do-er!
As we may very well have learned from Dubya, ("I'm the decider!") sometimes it's best to ask others for help instead of thinking you can handle everything yourself.
Maybe all I needed was someone to tell me it's okay to ask for help. Just make the ask. And when you do, perhaps you'll get what you need.