20 October, 2011

DAY 20 - Control of All Things

The 24 Things Clearing Challenge 
encourages you to make room in your home, heart, and mind to create an inspired future

"Let go and let God" might be one of my mother's favorite sayings. And I can assure you that this does not mean she attempts anything less than planning every moment of her day to try to accomplish the tasks of 3 women... it simply means that if one of those plans goes awry, she will do her best to let go and let God take care of it.

I've always admired this.
Although I've not always been able to do it.

Today was a busy day. I needed to leave the house at 9:30 AM dressed in something that would be appropriate all day and long into the night for the opening of the new play at my theatre and the festive party afterwards that would last until the wee hours. I needed to leave my office at 4 PM so I could drop off my "Congratulations!" cards at the theatre in Times Square, before heading back to Astoria on the subway so I could hop in the car and rush to pick my daughter up from day care, so I could meet my friends at our apartment at 5:45 PM who graciously agreed to babysit for the night, so I could get them all set up with everything they needed, freshen up, and leave the house by 6:20 PM so I could make it back to Times Square for the 7 PM curtain. Needless to say, this was a day that was planned. To the minute.

Everything was going smoothly... until I got to our car, sat in the driver's seat, turned it on, put it in reverse, and looked behind me. There was a van - an unmarked van - blocking me into the driveway. There was no way around it. There was no way out. There was no way to tell whose van it was or when they'd be coming back or who I could yell at contact so they could move it out of my way. I was so focused on The Plan that I didn't even see the van when I passed by it on my way into the car.

The clock was ticking and I felt paralyzed. What was I supposed to do? It was 5:15 PM. If I could get on the road in the car, I'd be back at our apartment to meet the babysitters in plenty of time for their 5:45 arrival. But without that ability, my only other option was to walk the 25 minutes to the day care (and the 25 minutes back) to pick up my girl... thereby obviously throwing a big wrench in The Plan and possibly even missing my own opening night curtain. Oh, the horror!

After an "I'm freaking out" call to my husband, I quickly realized there was not much I could do and I truly had to let this one go. I called my friends and asked them to meet me at the apartment a little after 6 o'clock instead; and I started walking. But I didn't even make it to the end of the block before I heard a vehicle starting up on the road behind me and whipped my head around to see the dreaded van slowing moving down the street. Oh, the blessing!

I hurried back to the car and was back at the house by 6 o'clock - freshening up and ready to get my daughter re-acclimated with her babysitters for the night. I was back on the subway by 6:30 and at my theatre with 10 minutes to spare before the curtain rose on one of the best opening nights I've ever been a part of.

The results of today's letting go: giving in to a situation that I couldn't control and learning that somehow, even without my Plan being perfect, it will all be okay.

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