2010 HANDBOOK

These beautiful reminders were forwarded to me with this message:  "This arrived from my daughter, a civil engineer, serving in Bagram, Afghanistan.  Some of the most meaningful life lessons are learned from our children, if we are open to them."  As we head into the hospital later tonight to begin the childbirth process for our own daughter, it's thoughts like these that will be wonderful to keep in mind.

Health

> Drink plenty of water.

> Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.

> Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.

> Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy

> Play more games.

> Read more books than you did last year.

> Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.

> Sleep for 7 hours.

> Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality

> Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

> Don't have negative thoughts for things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

> Don't over do it.  Keep your limits.

> Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

> Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.

> Dream more while you are awake.

> Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

> Forget issues of the past; that will ruin your present happiness.

> Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

> No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

> Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.

> Smile and laugh more.

> You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree...

Society

> Call your family often.

> Each day give something good to others.

> Forgive everyone for everything.

> Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.

> Try to make at least three people smile each day.

> What other people think of you is none of your business.

> Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will.

> Stay in touch.

Life

> Do the right thing.

> Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

> However good or bad a situation is, it will change...

> No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

> The best is yet to come...

> Your Inner most is always happy. So - be happy.

COMMITTED (Podcast)

I recently received an email from a lovely woman who works at Penguin Group (publishers of Elizabeth Gilbert's COMMITTED) - she stumbled across my blog and shared a few links with me that I'd like to pass along to anyone who's interested:

CLICK HERE to listen to a podcast - Elizabeth's thoughts on writing this book and her views on marriage.  CLICK HERE to read an excerpt from Elizabeth's book.

How nice to be stumbled across! 

MAKEOVER

Giving my blog a makeover. 
What do you think? 

As with all makeovers, it starts off as someone else's idea (this new template, for example) and slowly transitions into your own "look".  As I attempt to improve my blog's look and function and style, I hope you'll take a moment to let me know what you like (or don't like) and what you'd like to see.

"CONTRACTIONS"

I had always assumed that when you started having labor contractions, they'd sort of hit you over the head or knock the wind out of you or something so you would know it was really happening...

But not true.  Or at least not true for me.  In an effort to "naturally" induce labor, I had acupuncture performed on me yesterday afternoon - and since about 9:45pm last night, I've been having minor 30-second-ish contractions every hour.  That's 18 hours already of a nudging reminder, every 60 minutes or so, that I'm kind of getting started with the whole labor/delivery thing, but not quite there yet.

While this is definitely an exciting sign, I'm also trying to follow my partner's advice of "not getting too much in my head" about it today.  I'm sure the hit-you-over-the-head contractions will start soon enough - so I'll enjoy these mild ones for now & just recognize them as green signs along the labor highway, letting me know I'm still in the right lane.

COMMITTED by Elizabeth Gilbert

This morning - after only 2 and a 1/2 days, (the advantage of being on maternity leave without yet having a baby... luxurious reading time!) I finished the book COMMITTED by Elizabeth Gilbert.  Gilbert wrote one of my favorite books, EAT PRAY LOVE, shortly after going through a rough divorce.  COMMITTED is her follow-up in which she comes to terms with re-marrying, even though she was incredibly skeptical about the whole thing: marriage as an institution.  I love Gilbert's writing style - like a memoir without getting too sappy, smart and filled with research and wide opinions. 

For a few (that's an understatement!) of my favorite quotes from the book, check out Borrowing Wisdom - our new venture to keep all the memorable writings we love in one place.

DUE DATE

I know it's not an exact science. I know it's an estimation. I know that unless my doctor was also a psychic she would never be able to tell me the exact date (and maybe not even then). But it's so hard not to put faith in that date. It's hard not to believe that she'll be here in these next 24 hours, on the 24th, just like they said. Whomever they were that said it. Only 5% of babies are born on their supposed due date. 5% is what they say. They say a lot of things.

Contrary to the popular belief that I may be "over" being pregnant and just want the whole thing to come to an end - I've actually enjoyed my pregnancy, never having felt so powerful and attractive (most days) and happy about my own femininity. I know that can be rare. I know I've been lucky. I think it's just that I'm finally ready. After 30 years, several breaks and subsequent mendings of the heart, dreams of this day & all that is to come - it's time.

And like an anxious child, it seems I've been waiting through this week of Christmas Eves... but every morning the cookies are still there and the milk glass is still full, with no signs of a visit from You Know Who. And just as I will no doubt have many opportunities to teach my daughter, perhaps tonight is yet another opportunity to remind myself of that particular virtue of patience - and yet another thing that they say: good things come to those who wait.

MOM BLOGGERS

One of the bloggers that I love to read is an editor of the Silicon Valley Moms Blogs. She was one of my first employers when I moved to NYC, as I had the sheer joy of a job looking after her beautiful daughter for about 2 years while she & her husband worked during the weekdays. After different jobs, having another 2 kids, and moving to NJ for a while, this amazing woman, her husband, her 3 incredible kids, and her love of writing and cooking have taken up residence in my home-state of Ohio. I adore being able to catch up with her life via the world wide web.

Recently, she posted a note that if one were interested in being a contributing writer to the SV Moms Blogs, one could fill out this handy dandy application form. And as the event of my own motherhood is just around the corner, I submitted:

I grew up in Ohio (same wonderful house for 18 years) and have now lived 7 years in NYC. I always assumed that I'd somehow end up back in Ohio, married with children. Now just having entered my 30th year in this crazy world, I find myself in a committed (but un-married) relationship with an incredible partner and about to give birth to our first baby girl - in a city that challenges my ideas of how to raise a child and be a family and thrive, every day. A city that is a far cry from the warm, small town feeling of my Ohio home. My blog started out as a way to stay connected to my Ohio family... and is slowly continuing to evolve into an expression of how to become a family in New York City.

There is no doubt a long waiting list of mom bloggers from NYC that would like to get in on this group - so we'll just have to see what happens. But I like the idea of being part of this community
(co-mom-munity?)...

AQUARIUS

Although she's not here just yet, our daughter will officially now be an Aquarius. The Water Bearer. The dawning of the age. A few fun astrological insights into what our little girl might be like...

Aquarians are typically humane, frank, serious minded, genial, refined, sometimes ethereal, and idealistic, though this last quality is tempered with a sensible practicality. They are quick, active and persevering without being self-assertive, and express themselves with reason, moderation and sometimes, a dry humor. They are nearly always intelligent, concise, clear and logical. Many are strongly imaginative and psychically intuitive, so that the Age of Aquarius, which is about to begin, is much anticipated by psychic circles as an age in which mankind will experience a great spiritual awakening.

I mean, if THAT doesn't describe a life that was created by a combination of me and my beau, what does?!

JUST LIKE OLD TIMES

With a morning doctor appointment, lunch in Union Square, a trip to the Best Buy to (fingers crossed!) fix my laptop, and a late-afternoon second doctor appointment... it seemed best to spend the day in the city, rather than travel back and forth on the subway all day.

So, I'm hanging out at The Vineyard today. And it's just like old times. I can hear the bustle of many activities and the overlap of multiple conversations throughout the office. Bits and pieces of information. Someone calling someone else's name over the "wall" to help with a project. Interns learning the ropes. And the set for the new show being built in the theatre just a few feet away.

Among all the work, there's laughter and jokes. There will be coffee breaks and weekend stories. Friendly chatter combined with designing and proofreading and spreadsheet-making. And I feel right at home here. And a little homesick as well.

WORM

And so it happened. I have a virus. Well, my laptop does. The laptop that survived me well over the past several years. The laptop that is hopelessly out of date. The laptop that is a PC.

Now looming on the horizon are 2 very important questions:

1. Will the Geek Squad be able to save any of my files?
2. Will the next laptop finally push me into the MAC world?

WHAT MATTERS MOST

HERE'S WHAT I LIKE...

... the smell of our apartment
... the knowledge that we're having a baby (soon!!)
... the incredible comfort of our bed
... the quiet afternoons with football on the TV
... the singing on sunday mornings
... the deep discussions with my beau after church
... the thoughts we're having about parenting
... the real sense of having a true partner in life
... the simple things
... the things that matter most

LAST DAY AT THE OFFICE

BRAXTON HICKS

Cue "false labor" pains...
and "false labor" pains -
GO.

YET ANOTHER REASON

Although the picture doesn''t nearly do it justice, here's yet another reason why I love living in this crazy city... H&R Block put on a drum core / break dance show outside their newest location this morning (just a block from my office), presumably to start off the tax season, with flyers & balloons & free coffee. Who does that?!

Who cares. All I know is that I loved walking up from the subway and hearing the drums (which sent me back over a decade to high school marching band days) and then seeing these performers dance it out for a tax company. Performance + Commerce + Free Hand Outs... so common in NYC and yet I still enjoy it all.

YEAH, IT'S ALRIGHT

If you missed it tonight, you may still have another chance to see my favorite new musical from the 2008-2009 season, PASSING STRANGE, on PBS. For New Yorkers, you can get your fix at 2:00 AM on Friday the 15th or 12:15 PM on Sunday the 17th.

(Thank goodness for public television. And Great Performances. And Spike Lee. Check your local listings!)

OLD WIVES' TALE: LABOR FOODS

According to Wikipedia (one of my favorite sites): an old wives' tale is a type of urban legend, similar to a proverb, which is generally passed down by old wives to a younger generation. Such 'tales' usually consist of superstition, folklore or unverified claims with exaggerated and/or untrue details. Today old wives' tales are still common among children in school playgrounds. Old wives' tales often concern pregnancy, puberty and nutrition.

A friend of a friend has told me that eating eggplant can start labor (it happened to his sister). I've also heard that of eating spicy foods. So what did I do with this information? I Googled it, of course.

And came across this blog, and this restaurant (with a claim that more than 300 babies have been born to mothers who ate their Eggplant Parm just 48 hours before), and this baby foodie site...

But the best thing I came across was this story below - I love it! Maybe I'll try one of these foods for lunch today. If it works, I'll let you know :)

"I just ran into my neighbor Wendy, who in the course of talking about births and such, told me about another food-to-labor anecdote. A week past her due date, Wendy told me, she and her husband Mark went to Amherst Chinese because she’d heard that certain spices were thought to stimulate labor. Just after she ordered Mu Shu Chicken, she went into labor, so they asked to have the food to go. In the car on the way home, Wendy opened her fortune cookie and it read: Don’t wait."

EVER CLOSER

Getting closer and closer...
we're one fifth of the way there!

FOOD, INC.

"I mean, a culture that just views a pig as a pile of protoplasmic inanimate structure to be manipulated by whatever creative design that humans can foist on that critter will probably view individuals within its community and other cultures in the community of nations with the same type of disdain and disrespect and controlling type mentality."
- Polyface Farms' Joel Salatin

HOME DAY CARE

Seems we may have found the perfect mix of day care - at least perfect for us - in this lovely woman's home, right by Astoria Park... chiming clocks, private backyard... a retired mom who takes care of only 2 babies at a time and happens to have an opening... very intimate one-on-one (or sometimes one-on-two) attention... Montessori-based, loving environment... a place where we felt at home when we walked in & both turned to each other seconds after leaving with smiles on our faces, feeling like we just found a diamond in the rough. Just have to double check the many references she gave us & then make the leap!

"I FORGOT MY PANTS"

TAKING NOTES

One of the many things I love about my partner: the way he learns. The way he totally involves himself in whatever it is he wants/needs to learn about. The notes he takes. And in this case, the fact that he's spent so much time and energy reading about our upcoming childbirth, so that he can learn to be an even better supportive partner when I'll need him the most. How lucky am I?

AH-HAH

I feel as though my partner and I have had an "Ah-Hah" moment today. We're sync-ed. Our minds are linked up about a potential project that has us both creating and imagining and envisioning things about our future (and our child's) that excite us both. The idea sparked after church today when we were talking about how to teach our daughter the beliefs we have, the pillars by which we are trying to live our lives, without necessarily having a "church" to go to that fully encompasses those beliefs.

How to infuse those beliefs into our lives beyond just the home, beyond setting an example within our family; how to break it down into simpler stories or parables, like more established religions already do; how to tell those stories in a way that are relate-able and manageable instead of going from 0 to 60, from nothing to Something, from vague to concrete... a bridge, perhaps. A path. A wooden sign along the trail that helps to affirm your direction.

The possibilities of it all make my head spin (in a good way!). And the potential adventure of creating something that's important to both of us - and especially with my partner, whom I love and trust and in whom I have so much faith - is more inspiring than anything I've felt in quite some time.

THAT'S RIGHT

A gift from a friend that's sure to make me smile on those days when I feel anything but "hot".

NEW COVER

The infant car seat we have is a hand-me-down (hand-me-up?) from my younger brother, since his 2-year-old has outgrown it - thanks, dude! And then a sweet friend of mine re-made the interior lining with this pretty fabric we picked out together - thanks, dudette! Can't wait to put the old car seat together with the new fabric...

KNITTING BOOK CLUB

Tonight was the first meeting of our Knitting Book Club: a group of 8 delightful women who like to knit and read and chat... and feel cooler by being part of a club :)

The first book we've decided to read: LET THE GREAT WORLD SPIN by Colum McCann. The synopsis: In the dawning light of a late-summer morning, the people of lower Manhattan stand hushed, staring up in disbelief at the Twin Towers. It is August 1974, and a mysterious tightrope walker is running, dancing, leaping between the towers, suspended a quarter mile above the ground. In the streets below, a slew of ordinary lives become extraordinary in bestselling novelist Colum McCann’s stunningly intricate portrait of a city and its people.

For our next meeting at the end of February perhaps we'll have to rename it the Knitting Book Club Plus Baby!

FULL TERM

As of today, I am officially Full Term. 37 weeks. Our baby could come at any time and it would no longer be considered "premature".

We spent the last week looking into pediatricians, day care options, packing our hospital bag, making an emergency contingency plan with our good friend (and convenient neighbor!), stocking the pantry and freezer, planning our January baby budget, and generally preparing as much as we possibly can. Ready or not, here she comes!

ONE MORE YEAR

On January 1st 2009, I took a moment to look back on that year of many changes and much growth. I can hardly believe that in just another round of 365 days there's even MORE change and growth (literally!) that's happened this past year.

I moved in with a lovely lady friend and slept on an air mattress for 5 months. I began dating for the first time since living in New York (7 years!). I finally had some closure with an old relationship. I witnessed a plane land in the Hudson river, and the end of a presidency, and the beginning of a new one. I also felt lonely.

I watched my college team win the Superbowl. I had an incredible night at an iconic NYC venue working with old colleagues. I had drinks with - and became friends with - someone I've admired since I was a little girl. I felt overwhelmed at work.

I had a true "only in New York" experience and dated a guy from the FDNY. I completed my first show as a general manager all on my own. I went to NYC places I'd never been like Jazz at Lincoln Center and Roseland. I began having deep discussions about marriage and relationships with someone I held in high regard. I pictured this.

I spent a fun night in a hotel. I was complimented by a director I truly admire. I had an Easter I'll always remember. I felt the possibility of a miracle. I took a road trip to the Finger Lakes with a good friend to be with another good friend. I saw great theatre.

I read a few wonderful books. I spent time with a few wonderful people. I received a few wonderful gifts. I worked with a few wonderful colleagues. I saw a few wonderful movies.

I felt like God had his finger on the fast forward button of my life's remote control. I survived a challenging tech week for the first musical at my theatre. I rediscovered my affections for a great band. I had cautious optimism. I celebrated Father's Day in a new way.

I spent a weekend of independence with people I love. I moved into my 7th apartment in 7 years. I took a much needed trip home. I was proud to work in a place that debated Art vs. Business. I became a car owner. I discovered the joys of New York City servies.

I celebrated the birthday of the man I love. I learned why people love Vermont. I became infatuated with The West Wing. I could finally share incredible news with everyone. I was becoming a parent.

I got advice from all sides. I started setting up "The Nook". I took a leap that somehow felt much bigger than anything else I'd done yet. I had a dream. I started singing at a church again and it was wonderful.

I began my 30's. I was inspired to write, remembering that time flies. I saw the most precious picture. I opened a fun show. I started receiving gifts - both funny & sweet.

I worked with an icon from the 80's. I was amazed at my body. I was part of a documentary. I took classes with my beau to prepare us for the future. I saw her move. I had a Thanksgiving that will go down in the history books.

I enjoyed my first real Christmas tree in years. I was truly surprised at work. I got a diploma. I spent my first Christmas not at home, but still somehow at home (home with a new meaning). I started feeling like Little Red: "excited and scared". I took a breath and my partner's hand and began looking toward 2010 with wide eyes and an even wider heart.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Yes, it's true.
These responsible people will be parents in less than one month.